Pre-wired Recession.

I believe that deep depressive states of mind are brought about by deeds unkind.  Sedona’s Method has no interest to my specific place, it’s not up to me to just give grace.  Its all I’ve done is laid about, allowed to trample on my brow.  What I need is sincere circuits through within and under ground.

No one is connected.  I am my own.

My chest feels tight and my veins swollen.

Is this what high blood pressure is?  I’m totally immobile in my quest for greatness.  I am tired of sleeping on the floor on a flat beanbag.  The weight of the wasted life that I am defeats my purpose.  I want to move on, but can’t find the traction I need to let go.  This negligence is defining my fate.

I’m not crazy, this world is.

Bursts of insights occur less often, fear of speaking negatively against our leadership in fear of my life and wellbeing keeps my thoughts in line with the cattle. Complacency becomes a safe-haven of bliss. Conformity into the American model of debt is no matter.

Why do we choose to live in such a state of fear and no self value? Why do we slaughter and destroy in order to consume? Compassion is continually being devoured by greed.

Is there any way to change the course? Does talking about it accomplish anything? There has to be more unrest and dissatisfaction.

Jesus Christ, Discovered?

I watched the tail-end of the March 4th special “Jesus’ Family Tomb” video on the Discovery Channel. I am not really surprised at all about the discovery, and the overwhelming evidence that it really is. But I am surprised that they originally discovered it in 1980. Why has it taken so long to be taken seriously? I need to watch the entire movie to see the actual details in the tomb. I can’t believe that modern Christianity would frown upon parenthood, and the true love of this world, and label it as a sin. Threatening your entire existence to be tortured by flames forever. Why do our “spiritual leaders” leverage fear to control us?

State of Chaos

I must admit I am quite a bit of a conspiracy theorist. I know how serious people take religion, and occultism is the most organized of them all. But it is all spoken lightly of and always treated like a fairy-tale. Worshiping of gods is a serious business, and following orders from your leaders is not a question, but an order punishable by death. What is this world? Why do we have to build bombs and fight over resources? Isn’t there enough to go around? Can’t we determine ways of distributing bare necessities to everyone, and stop bickering about who owns what? This planet is not that big, and its not going to be around that much longer. We better focus on repairing it, and repairing our animosities. I tend to believe that there are some dark orders being called from high ranks. I find it strange how much power and fame one can get by riding on the glory of the beast, war and aggression are more lion-like traits than any tame beast I have heard of.. I need to do some more research about the layout of the Washington DC area. I can see how the symbols of the compass and eastern star are blatently obvious. But I want to look into the purpose and meaning of each of those buildings and any further symbology in thier signifigance.

Billiards as an Oracle?

There is a pool table here in the house that I’m staying now.  I am really enjoying it.  I like how practice brings experience.  I have been playing against myself, just switching in my head if I am stripes or solids.  And I decided to play a game or two determining ahead of time, the outcome for stripe or solid.  Seems just as good of a dousing instrument as any, probably even more precise.  You can read symbology into any chain of events.  Everything is a reflection of the vibe each of us and every object projects.  I am starting to get more shots in as I focus and take better aim, and get more comfortable holding the cue right.  Duh.

Chaos Theory

I can’t help but think that everything is staged. Planned out way in advance. There seems to be an overwhelming amount of evidence that proves that occult organizations have been writing history melenia long before it comes to pass. The design of the Great Seal of the United States is pretty blatent to an occultist showing the goal of the empire. I went on a tour of the Masonic temple in Salt Lake once, and its interesting that everything is centered around stage performances. Life is what you make it, and with proper planning we are the ones who mold it into shape. I am dissatisfied with the power structure, and dream of an existance which focuses on happiness instead of stress.

It Ends, and Begins

I have been in an unhappy relationship for much too long. I know I could change myself and be happy, but I haven’t. I feel trapped and under-appreciated. I have left her, and I am sad. But I must focus on myself and my goals. I feel like I have an obligation to create a new level of internet driven software to make the world a better place. It is not her that I am unsatisfied with, it is me.